Most scary monster

Monster, devil...
Big huge dangerous man holding a gun...

Can they hurt you?
Ha, what can they do ? at most hurt you physically, kill you?

Somehow i suddenly got a thought tat, nothing can hurt you as much as the one you love the most hurt you.. Betrayal!!?

I was quite disappointed with my bro sticking his soul into his world again..
last time i tried to get in his world by join his gaming world, and tried to understand him.
i thought i can drag him back, but now he is going back again...

I feel that i had let him down as a brother... forget about him for the last 2years..
i thought that he had grow up, or simply i was selfish, i only care about myself...
on way or the other i lost my soul too, punishment .........

why should i hold on to something in the past that hurt me and not move on .......

I trying to save everything around me... luckily my friends are back with me ...
Career is picking up... i going towards my dream... currently in phillips and working in the trading room.. DREAM close lol.. Everything will fall into my planning .. gogogo !

35 i will open my own cafe... and be a fund manager...

Still there is alot of work and alot more to do... hiaz i really hope i could get back wat i had last time ...

There is still one dark dark area in my life, tat made me so difficult to trust again..
trust love? ... or believe tat there is true love again...
i wonder why i am coming back to this thought again...
maybe the pain in me had never left..
maybe i just hid the pain...
or maybe i am really just a silly man....

i am still praying to let myself walk out of this, believe tat love is something that could happen again..

Never let down the person that love you the most!...